Thursday, July 06, 2006

The Pain of No Ethnic Connection

The ANNOTICO Report

 

This young lady  bemoans the absence of "connection" with a rich Ethnic Cultural Identity. She apparently grew up as a non Italian in an Italian neighborhood. Let Not your children suffer this inner void. 

 

 

 

Hyphenated Americans

Cleaning My Closet:

by Meredith Elizabeth Reiniger  

From :The Empty Closet 

Wednesday, 05 July 2006

 

 

I am Mongrel-American. I have no real ethnic identity. No events celebrated like the ancestors of yore. No grandmother bent over an ethnic pot of food. No be-aproned auntie leaning down to the oven door, lifting the sweet aroma of breads just like in the old country. I never danced to tunes played on foreign fiddles or flutes, never twirled in a frilly ethnic dress. I never marched in a handmade, wool, old world plaid. All this never-ness was quite a loss for me as a child.

My friends had such joyous connections to distant lands. They were linked to a magical away-ness where babies and elders looked like Kodak subjects, where indigenous people lived in National Geographic abodes, wore colorful native costumes, and dined on exotic foods whose ingredients were fresh from the farmer's hands into the baskets of mythical matriarchs.

Alas, I was fed with mundane, multi-disguised ground beef while wearing saddle shoes. I was anguished.

I was a g! irl with no interesting background. Origin unknown. Some fore-persons must have immigrated many eons ago, but there are no pictures from the mother country. No Ellis Island stories. Family history talk, of which there was very little, indicated that all of our ancestors, such a time, came over as indentured servants....

When I was young, I was rather jealous of my grammar school friends who all had clear and obvious connections to the mysterious old country. My neighbor friend was a Marino, and his grandfather had a grape arbor in his yard... in fact, it was his yard, and he made wine and grew garlic. "Grandpa" to all of us, he had an interesting ethnic beard and interesting old country pants that had suspenders to hold them up. In his back pocket, he had a large, red, cotton handkerchief that he would use to wipe the perspiration from his brow as he lifted his fascinating ethnic straw hat from his head. I so wanted such a relative.

My friend Geraldine had a gran! dmother who spoke Italian and made pasta from scratch which she hung to dry on special pasta clothes-rack-thingies. Very ethnically charming. Another friend lived with her parents and her single uncle, and a little, bent over grandfather who lived in a room off their kitchen, and, upstairs, her aunt Antoinette and husband who had dark, dark black hair.

I believed that the shared housing was part of being a good, foreign family, a sign of special attachment. Furthermore, those girlfriends were Catholic. So they both got to wear very pretty, dainty, frilly, lacy, net-y white dresses for their first holy communion ceremonies. With veils. But even better, they had a party with a huge sheet cake covered in pink and yellow frosting roses. Best yet, we could have as many pieces as we wanted. "Go ahead, eat. Enjoy." That's what all the ethnic-specific mothers said.

Another deprivation I suffered: my ethnic groups never had a nationally acknowledged cultural holiday. Only! the Irish have one.

 

[RAA Note: Italians Celebrate Columbus Day, AND St Pat was a Roman!!!!!]

 

In March, people everywhere seem to want to have temporary Irish citizenship which allows them to wear all manner of green items, to decorate their bodies, desks, and homes with shamrocks, and to accompany leprechauns to bars where great quantities of green beer can be consumed with impunity.

Even if I were German-American, I wouldn't get a holiday, a day with the whole country wanting to wear leather pants while eating sauerbraten. Even if I were English-American, there is no nostalgia for England, no day on which every American carries a black umbrella and has tea and crumpets with the gang. The Dutch? Hardly acknowledged in any form. No wooden shoes for a day. No parade of windmills and tulips.

Recently, I have felt the urge for a word to attach to my nationality. I'm not quite sure how to select a meaningful amendment. It makes sense that persons with two citizenships would identify themselves with two words, like my Canadian-American friend! . It makes sense to use two nationalities in order to connect to relatives who still live Over There, who invite you to their villa, and who converse with you in their language which you learned at your immigrant-relative's knee, like my Italian-American friend.

I believe that Americans (should) celebrate the strength of their ancestors and honor the dignity of their long-ago families born on that continent by using the hyphenated identifier...


(But) I never met a Swiss-American. I never considered calling myself a Dutch-American. I could, I suppose, be a German-Dutch-English-American. Never met a French-American, too adversarial to admit, but  (in this strong feeling to be connected with some degree of ethnicity, I might consider being a Three-Years-of-High-School-French-American....

MeredithElizabethReiniger@frontiernet.net

 

 

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