
Monday, July 26, 2010
Snooki Psychoanalyzed
Flake, cow, loser,
slut, idiot, airhead, trash, penguin, creep, moron, midget, freak, Oompa-Loompa,
a nobody. And those are the NICE things.
Snooki’s Time
The New York Times; By Caty Horyn;
July 23, 2010
FLAKE, cow, loser, slut, idiot, airhead,
trash, penguin, creep, moron, midget, freak, Oompa-Loompa, nobody.
It’s another day in the kitchen of
Andy Polizzi - volunteer firefighter, auto salvage manager and father of
Nicole Polizzi, the 4-foot-9-inch Snooki, yowling star of "Jersey Shore"
- and words cannot hurt him. Sticks and stones! After a season of the hit
reality show about a bunch of Italian-Americans sharing a beach house,
Andy is used to the terrible stuff that people say about his little girl,
and if he had to, he looks built enough under his "Papa Snooks" T-shirt
to take them down.
He has welcomed a reporter into his
home, a ranch in the middle of the ranchlands and big riding-tractor front
lawns of Marlboro, N.Y., across the river from Poughkeepsie, amid the orchards
and dairy bars off Route 9W. There’s a swimming pool in the backyard stuffed
with water toys and surrounded by a chain-link fence. Inside, the house
has the snug plenitude of a man who likes his comforts close at hand. He
has been divorced 10 years.
But he has to be honest, he said,
folding his arms on the kitchen table: He doesn’t understand the public’s
fascination with his daughter.
“When we go to venues, I like to
stand out in the crowd," he said. "She’ll be up there hooting and hollering,
and I’ll say to someone, ‘What is it that draws you to my daughter? Be
honest.’ Because it’s very hard for me to see what it is. She don’t sing.
She don’t dance. I don’t want to say she don’t have talent ..." He seemed
to have his doubts. Then he shrugged. "Everyone basically says they can
relate to her. I think Nicole’s just a likeable person."
He went along in this worn rut of
relatedness and just-folks-like-us celebrity bunkum " for, alas, fame has
come to him, too" and then, hearing his daughter coming noisily down
the hall from the garage, he said quickly, "Let me ask you: What do you
think of the show and what do you think of Nicole?"
Ah.
Everybody seems to have an opinion
about "Jersey Shore", which begins its second season on MTV on Thursday
night. Italian-American groups hate it because the cast members " Snooki,
Mike (The Situation), Jenni (JWoww), Pauly D and the rest " are into "Guidos"
and "Guidettes" and how much gel they can pump into their hair before they
make the chicken parm. In the first episode, Snooki got drunk, threw up
and passed out.
The obsession about tanning and the
gym has led to parodies on YouTube. Even President Obama has weighed in
on Snooki’s scarily dark tan, referring to it because of a proposed tanning-bed
tax. Senator John McCain Twittered her. ("I do rec wearing sunscreen!")
The action takes place in Seaside
Heights and, at least for part of the new season, in South Beach. Since
the show’s personalities are painted with broad strokes (the better for
the rest of us to mock them), you accept that the housemates have no other
aim than partying and avoiding a "grenade" in the hot tub (the guys’ term
for an ugly chick). Clearly the series relies on the chem-lab formula used
by other reality shows, in which volatile and juvenile temperaments are
thrown together for fun explosions.
Yet while such behavioral snippets
compelled some 4.8 million people to watch "Jersey Shore" at the end of
the first season " almost triple the number of viewers for the premiere
last December " the main point of outrage on blogs is that the show has
absolutely no redeeming value.
"The adventures of the most irrelevant
people on earth", as someone wrote recently on a gossip blog. And
even viewers who claim to love "Jersey Shore" usually find it hard to say
why.
"Everything about this show is super-sized
" from the over-the-top hair to the over-the-top nature of the comments",
said Robert J. Thompson, a professor of television and popular culture
at Syracuse University. If you can’t tell, he’s an avid fan. "Jersey
Shore" is brilliantly cast and, of course, Snooki is the star, he said.
"The name doesn’t hurt for a start."
And she’s short, drawing our attention
like a berserk windup toy. "And she’s so loud," Professor Thompson exclaimed.
"Her dialect is ratcheted up 1,000 volts."
That Snooki is not conventionally
attractive "A spray-painted Chihuahua". Mike (The Situation) said
when he first saw her, has a lot to do with why she is the breakout member
of the cast. She is busty and short-waisted with small legs; sort of like
a turnip turned on its tip. There is the weird tan, but the pièce
de résistance of Snookiness is the half-doughnut-shaped pouf on
top of her head.
The pouf has been her signature,
along with her frisky nickname, since she was in high school in Marlboro,
where she was a cheerleader. "The pouf is like a Guidette thing, and usually
on teen night all the girls did it", she explained when I first met
her, in May, in South Beach. “Eventually all my friends grew out of it
and went to straight hair".
With a blank look, she shrugged.
"Me, I like the pouf. I’m still going to rock it."
Snooki has a way of putting herself
together that while in some ways is atrocious, is completely identifiable
to her and consistent with her attention-seeking personality. She wears
short, clingy dresses in a pattern or with some metallic trim, huge enameled
or bejeweled hoop earrings and glittery high heels.
Lots of 22-year-old women wear revealing
clothes, but they may not have her body shape, and it’s a safe bet they’re
not rocking a pouf. Though that may change when a line of Snooki hair products
comes out. Anyway, the effect has been interesting. "If you were to draw
a cartoon of her, you would know immediately who she is," said Chris Linn,
the executive vice president for pilots at MTV. "She’s an icon".
But trying to hold a conversation
with Snooki is a little like getting down on your hands and knees with
a child. You have to come down to her level, and sometimes you almost think
you need to bribe her with a piece of candy to coax her to be more responsive.
She is really only responsive to her own immediate needs and desires. She
is not self-centered, but she is used to acting out and getting away with
it.
"She loves to be the center of attention",
said Stephanie Greiner, a friend since childhood, who lives in Marlboro.
"Nicole was also kind of a mean girl in high school. She was the boss of
everybody".
At the same time, she doesn’t exhibit
normal levels of self-control for a woman her age. Her father, referring
to her antics on "Jersey Shore". said, "It’s not an act she’s putting on".
and as if to prove that, he described a recent visit by Snooki to his office:
"Instead of standing at the counter and saying, ‘Can I speak to my father?’
she walks in and goes, ‘Daddy, Daddy!’ And people are looking at her. It’s
not an act. It’s just the way she is."
Not surprisingly, Snooki is an only
child, adopted when 6 months old (she was born in Santiago, Chile). Her
parents do everything for her " her laundry, her cooking " just as they
did when she was a community college student studying to be a veterinary
technician and living at home. She saw a Facebook ad for the MTV show and
auditioned. "They were calling out Guidos and Guidettes, and I thought,
Hello!" Snooki said on the Miami set. "So I went and I auditioned and here
I am".
Today she has 300,000 followers on
Twitter but no idea how much money she has. "Not a clue", said her dad,
who handles her finances and deals with her manager, Scott Talarico of
Neon Entertainment in Buffalo. (According to published reports, the cast
members each received $10,000 an episode and are expected to get $30,000
an episode in the third season.)
When I was in South Beach, I spoke
to the producer, Sally Ann Salsano, a veteran of reality television and
the head of 495 Productions, as well as the show’s den mother. Talking
to Ms. Salsano, who is from Farmingdale, on Long Island, made me more sympathetic
about the cast.
"I was that girl, just like them,
who had lived at home until I was 25", Ms. Salsano said. "It’s that East
Coast mentality. It’s the Italian upbringing — why would you leave? It’s
so good here. My brother lived at home until he was 32, when he got married.
In a twin bed in his room. To us, it’s not weird."
"I remember this year going home
for Christmas", she said. "Episode 3 had just aired, with Snooki and all
the drama. Every single member of my family was going, like, ‘Oh, my God,’
and I remember looking around the Christmas table and saying to myself,
If a reporter were here now ... Everyone’s screaming, there’s enough food
to feed four countries. All the stereotypes that people accused us of making.
I’m thinking, everyone looks like that to me. Two of my uncles are in Puma
sweatsuits. I have four guys named Sal at the table. I’m Sally Ann. It’s
not weird to me".
I asked Ms. Salsano about the cast
members getting an attitude because of the show’s success. Last season
it was the highest-rated cable show among young adults.
"Here’s what I always say: I won’t
stand for it", she said. "They all live in their mom’s basement and I know
it. Last season I had to buy them cigarettes and Diet Cokes. They’re the
same kids they’ve always been. Sure, they have a bit more money. They have
more clothes with rhinestones on them than they did last year."
This still doesn’t address Snooki’s
strange appeal. And part of the problem is that she can’t explain it herself.
She simply isn’t capable of serious introspection. She told me she has
read only two books in her life, "Twilight" and "Dear John." When we were
in the kitchen at her dad’s house, I asked Snooki if she were inspired
by any movie actresses. "Movies?" she said thickly. "I really liked Brittany
Murphy. Yeah. I looked up to her. She had a dorky personality, like me.
It was sad that she died."
"You have a dorky personality?" I
asked her.
"Yeaahh, don’t you think," she drawled,
playing with her hair. "I’m a nut job. And I don’t care." She looked at
her father.
“You are you," he said.
As much as Professor Thompson is
a fan of the show, "I certainly wouldn’t want to be stuck in an elevator
with her," he said. The fact is, Snooki is much more interesting as a character
than she is in any other context. "We don’t even know how to define what
Snooki is so good at" he said. He thinks she has a "delicious artlessness,"
an unprocessed quality. ///
With the help of her managers, Snooki
is trying to spin her image into Snooki-theme products and maybe (co-write)
a book, which undoubtedly she will never read, and naturally she would
like to have her own reality show. But like a rare, unstable gas, she is
not likely to last much beyond the moment, or to extend her effect to another
medium like film. As Professor Thompson said, “Give her a script and you’ve
taken away the very thing she’s good at: being herself.”
http://www.nytimes.com/2010/07/25/
fashion/25Snooki.html?_r=1&pagewanted=all
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