Dear Family and Friends,

I have been watching you very closely to see if you have been good this year

and since you have I had instructed Santa Clause to have his elves make some 

goodies for him to leave under your tree at Christmas.

Santa was going to bring you all gifts from the 12 days of Christmas, but he 

advises me that he had  a little problem. The 12 fiddlers fiddling have all come 

down with VD from fiddling with the 10 ladies dancing, the 11 lords leaping 

have knocked up the 8 maids a-milking, and the 9 pipers piping have been 

arrested for doing weird things to the 7 swans a-swimming.

The 6 geese a-laying, 4 calling birds, 3 French hens, 2 turtle doves and

the partridge in a pear tree have me up to my boot tops in bird shit.

On top of all this Mrs. Clause is going through menopause, 8 of Santa's

reindeer are in heat, the elves have joined the gay liberation and some

people who can't read a calendar have scheduled Christmas for the 5th of January.

Maybe next year Santa and I will be able to our shit together and bring you the

things you want. This year I suggest you get your asses down to Wal-Mart

before everything is gone.

Sincerely,

Richard Annotico

The Very Best of the Holidays to each and Every one of you, and your loved ones,  and and a healthy, happy, prosperous New Year

My apologies if any one was offended by the somewhat rude language used. It was a mere attempt to add a laugh to that which should be a joyous season, and to offset my usually TOO serious nature. It was sent to me by my adorable and married grand niece.